By sil

Feeling old, depending on how old you are

I recently discovered Martin O’Leary‘s Feeling Old twitter bot,1 which has a big list of “things that have happened” and then constructs comparisons such as “Y2K was as close to the release of Return of the Jedi as to now”, to make you do that weird “wow, I am old!” double-take. As Martin says, it occasionally throws out a gem. But, looking through the list, I think that they’re probably all gems, but whether they hit home for you depends on how old you are.

Basically, the form of the sentence is: thing is closer to old thing than to today. Ideally, you want thing to be something that you think is recent, and old thing to be something that you think is ancient, and therefore you’ll be surprised that thing really isn’t actually recent and that’s because you’re a decrepit old codger.

My theory is this: old thing ought to be before you were born. By definition, anything that happens before you were born feels like a long time ago to you. And the gap between thing and old thing is the same as the gap between thing and now (because that’s what constructs the sentences). So thing has to happen in the first half of your life. Stuff that happens while you’re a young child also feels like a long time ago — you were a kid when it happened! — so we want something that happened once you started to feel like you in your head. Say, around 12 or so years of age. Thus, we take a big list of pop culture things, find an event which happened between the ages of 12 and half your current age, find a corresponding old event, display them to you, and have you be surprised and displeased. It’s a living.

Give it a try.

I was born

  1. because I was reading his excellent work on how to create accurate looking fantasy maps ↩

More in the discussion (powered by webmentions)

  • John Chandler responded at twitter.com RT @sil: Generating comparisons to make you feel old: kryogenix.org/days/2016/08/1…
  • Roberto Alsina responded at twitter.com @sil "The first Simpsons episode happened closer to Fidel Castro coming to power than to today." FUUUUUUUUCK
  • Stuart Langridge responded at twitter.com @ralsina see? :-)
  • Roberto Alsina responded at twitter.com @sil is that bot more/less evil than one that kills puppies? I don't know.
  • Roberto Alsina responded at twitter.com The most depressing program in the universe, courtesy of @sil: kryogenix.org/days/2016/08/1…
  • Don Rideaux-Crenshaw responded at plus.google.com "The Rocky Horror Picture Show happened closer to Babe Ruth's retirement than to today."Hey, you transvestites! Stop playing baseball on my lawn!
  • Mark Johnson responded at twitter.com @sil Having the old things being before I was born makes it hard to get a scale for when they happened
  • Mark Johnson responded at twitter.com @sil Rather than going "that was aaages ago" my brain goes "when was that, then?"
  • Thom Shutt responded at twitter.com RT @sil: Generating comparisons to make you feel old: kryogenix.org/days/2016/08/1…
  • Stuart Langridge responded at twitter.com @marxjohnson yeah. I have tried to pick things that people will know about and know happened "a long time ago", but it's difficult
  • x1101 responded at twitter.com @sil amusing. Also, I’ve heard you podcast enough that I read the whole thing hearing your voice. Its an odd thing my brain does.
  • Stuart Langridge responded at twitter.com @x1101 blog posts tend to be a bit stream of consciousness, so they're written in my speaking voice :)
  • x1101 responded at twitter.com @sil This line really did me in: “and that’s because you’re a decrepit old codger.”
  • Andrew Spencer responded at twitter.com RT @sil: Generating comparisons to make you feel old: kryogenix.org/days/2016/08/1…
  • Birmingham.IO responded at twitter.com Stuart Langridge: Feeling old, depending on how old you are by @sil buff.ly/2aO8YA3 #PlanetBirmingham
  • Martin O'Leary responded at twitter.com A nice piece by @sil on how my bot @feelingoldbot works (on an emotional, rather than technical level): kryogenix.org/days/2016/08/1…
  • Martin O'Leary responded at twitter.com A nice piece by @sil on how my bot @feelingoldbot works (on an emotional, rather than technical level): kryogenix.org/days/2016/08/1…
  • Lars Westman responded at tag:plus.goo... (plus.google.com)
  • Andreas Lagerkvist responded at tag:plus.goo... (plus.google.com)
  • murph nj responded at tag:plus.goo... (plus.google.com)
  • Tim Süberkrüb responded at tag:plus.goo... (plus.google.com)
  • Jonathan Ive responded at www.apple.com I love the way your site looks, though I'm not really the Jony Ive. How easy is it for someone to discover the real author of this note? Please also c…
  • Checkmention responded at checkmention.appspot.com Congratulations! You've successfully handled a webmentioned note.
  • Does clicking me alert? responded at checkmention.appspot.com This test embeds XSS within the hcard name and time field. Clicking on the name or title should not raise an alert.
  • Checkmention XSS test responded at checkmention.appspot.com Clicking this should not cause an alert. This div should not alert. Try clicking this link alert("encoded-xss") and this too. Mouse o…
  • Roberto Alsina responded at twitter.com a friend of mine has created the world's most depressing site based on that kind of thing: kryogenix.org/days/2016/08/1… // CC @sil
  • Jay Lee responded at twitter.com As Days Pass By cc @CraigHlavaty kryogenix.org/days/2016/08/1…
  • Steve Downey responded at twitter.com Microsoft releasing Word happened closer to I Love Lucy premiering than to today. kryogenix.org/days/2016/08/1…
  • Jesse Walker responded at twitter.com The feeling that time is slipping away from you—automated! kryogenix.org/days/2016/08/1…
  • ⚒ Garry Harvey ⚒ responded at twitter.com That's brilliant and upsetting in equal measure
  • ⚒ Garry Harvey ⚒ responded at tag:twitter.... (twitter.com)
  • Gary Anderson responded at twitter.com @richardosman @rorysutherland You may like kryogenix.org/days/2016/08/1… for this, which generates lots of these comparisons, and makes everyone
  • Gary Anderson responded at twitter.com This is ace! @mattgirling
  • Christopher Smith responded at tag:twitter.... (twitter.com)
  • Doug Bailey responded at plus.google.com "‘Never Gonna Give You Up’ by Rick Astley happened closer to the Berlin Wall being built than to today." Ahhhhhgahhhhd.